And Now . . . Halftime!

Holy hell.  

What the hell is going on out there?

First, the defense:

Reed Doughty just ain't gettin' the job done at all.  He wiffed on D'Angelo Williams on the long run that ended with the Steve Smith fumble-recovery/touchdown.  Then he got smoked in coverage by Whatsisass Rosario.  I want this guy to be good.  Laron Landry better be Bob Sanders x 12.

Where in God's name is the defensive line?  Holy crap, they're getting pushed back from the line of scrimmage so fast they might as well call themselves linebackers.  London Fletcher is absolutely nowhere to be found.  Absolutely zero defense is being played in the middle of the field, and Carolina is running every rush and pass play between the hashmarks.  Greg Blache is over there looking at photos while his defense is having their balls shredded and their asses turned inside out.  Horrible. Absolutely horrible.

The Offense:

What offense?

When were they on the field?

Casey Rabach's soul is being anally raped by Damione Lewis.  Rabach might as well call himself a quarterback, he's spending more time in the Redskins backfield than Clinton Portis.  Ladell Betts is running like a total joke, diverting sideways and showing no interest in making contact with a defender at all.  Jon Jansen and Chris Samuels have long since handed their scrotums over to Carolina's ends.  

I'd say Jason Campbell is holding onto the ball too long, except I'm pretty sure a quarterback is supposed to be able to hold onto the ball for about 3 seconds after the snap.  So far, he's had about 3 seconds total in the pocket.  Still, he missed Antwan Randle-El on a route up the sideline and is averaging about 4 yards per attempt.  Putrid.

Special teams . . . what the fuck?  What's with guys bringing the ball out from 4 yards deep?  If I'm James Thrash, I'm tackling the shit out of Rock Cartwright and Devin Thomas as soon as they catch the ball in the endzone.  Holy hell.  That's the simple shit.  For fucks sake.

34-0.  At halftime.  303 offensive yards to 49.  178 rushing yards for Carolina.  Seriously, I can remember a time when the Carolina Panthers went completely nuts on the Redskins.  Tim Biakabatuka ran for about 180 yards and 3 scores when Norv Turner was running the show in Washington.  

If you're a mild-mannered guy like Jim Zorn, what the hell do you say to your team at halftime?  Do you quietly, and through gritted teeth, threaten to shank the children of your players and poison the drinking water if the execution doesn't improve?  Or do you go completely nuts and snap someone's neck in the locker room?  Jesus Effing Christ.  If the Redskins are this bad . . . well, hell with that . . . if the Redskins are even half, even a third this bad, they won't win 6 games this year.